[BH4] AGM Write up
jaws099 at aol.com
jaws099 at aol.com
Mon Apr 6 18:56:13 CDT 2009
So, I got really drunk on Sunday, April the 5th, 2009 AD. But,
unfortunately, not drunk enough. So I still remember a little bit of
the debacle that was the Blue Hen 2009 AGM.
So around April 1st or 2nd there goes out an announcement about there
being a hash starting at Salem Village Square shopping center at 3pm
Sunday April 5th. And for about 30-40 minutes there were 20 something
people there expecting to go on a Blue Hen Hash that day. Whether or
not there was a Blue Hen Hash, you, dear readers, please decide…
Death Wish =2
Yeast of Burden
Crash Test Dummy
Reach Around (Who got renamed that Day)
Just Nina (Who got a name that day)
Sand in Strange Places
S + M Man
Mary Fucking Poppins
Cleavage to Beaver
Sister Golden Shower
And a couple other people whose names I forgot. But they were all
expecting a Blue Hen trail.
About 3:39pm, the Hare Fuk Stik, and another hare, Don Quixote, pull up
in the VW bus, to live hare a trail. They had two other Pittsburgh
Hashers, Pelvis Chestly and Don
Quixote, live haring the second half.
So in this case, 4 hares equaled over 4 times the usual trail length.
We give them a 10 minute start, and……..
We find trail at Christiana High. We find a check. About an hour later,
one of us, Title 18 was able to finally see the marks and found what
direction we were supposed to go in.
Trail goes about across Salem Church Rd and thru the high tension power
lines, and possibly into the woods or into the neighborhood called
Gender Woods, it was hard to tell because we had several back checks
that completely contradicted each other. Skidmarks breaks out in front
of the pack, and eventually gets to the beer stop first. –About an hour
or two later. Bad Lay and Crash Test Dummy also disappear, but sniff
out part of the trail and follow it backwards to the beer stop.-About 2
or 3 hours later. Radar rides around on his mountain bike and picks up
trail somewhere- ditto.
Most of the pack follows trail thru Gender Woods neighborhood, and then
into the woods behind Gender Woods. The troll of Gender Woods, A
Hockessin Hasher named Whickwacker, steps out into his backyard and
screams, “Why are you people disturbing my woods?!!” The trail
continued thru woods, thorns, and swamp, about 5 or 6 miles of it. Then
we reach a clearing, and find ourselves in the middle of Todd Estates 2
and out on
We go back in forth across Rt. 4 trying to make sense out of the next
back check, until we find true trail that leads us to another back
check. 3 or 4 hashers decide 7 miles was enough trail to have without a
beer stop, wah! And so they head back to point A, where convieniently
there was a bar that was open.
Devil Woman and Yeast of Burden, find the true trail going thru
Chestnut Hill Estates, and, amazingly!!, over half the pack is able to
follow. Down Old Ogle Town Rd we go, under the Amtrak Bridge, across
the drainage pond, under a tunnel under the Amtrak Bridge, and
finally!!! A fucking beer stop. There thus ends the first part of trail
with Fuk Stik and Don Quixote, and a whole lot of beer. Pelvis Chestly
and Hung Like this are off haring the second half of the trail, and
thus we followed.
Trail went on White Clay Creek, behind the Avon Plant, into Harmony
Industrial Park, into the neighborhood Harmony Woods, than Dartmouth
Woods, then blah, blah, blah ….
I know you guys don’t care, I’ll get to the good stuff soon. Most of us
met back at the shopping center and drove to Jaime AKA Food Bitch’s
house for the On In.
So we circle up, penalties, awards and all that Jazz. Here’s what I
Reach Around, ran around on trail the whole day with a backpack full of
tch drinks, cause he can’t handle real beer. It was that
backpack that he wore like a fanny pack, so he was thus renamed: Juicy
Fruity Backside Booty.
Just Nina, revealed some type of embarrassing personal secret to
somebody, and got named: Wookie Patch. Whatever that means, whatever it
is, I haven’t seen it……yet.
And, of course, there were our elections. Here are the results:
Hash Cash: Re-elected for a third consecutive term, Toxic Waste!!!,
Because he can count, sort of, and because nobody else wants it.
Hash Harlot: Re-elected for a second consecutive term, Beardless Clam!!
Because nobody’s been a better Hash Harlot than BC, and if anybody else
tried grabbing my ass like that, I would probably hit them.
Religious Advisor: Elected for the first time at Blue Hen, Skidmarks!!!
Because he finally gave up the pen and paper he was using to run
circles at the Hockessin Hash. And, since he’s finally about to
complete his PHD at U of D and move away in a few months, he defiantly
fits in at the Blue Hen Hash.
Hare Razors: There are two now. Vaseline Alley!! and Thfkas!! Because
it takes more than the efforts of one to get this hash going again, and
those two literally have put in a lot of time and dedication for this
GM: We decided we needed to choose some younger blood this time. Turkey
Because the tall, dark, and apparently s
ingle one, has nothing better
to do than be the GM of Blue Hen.
Hash Trash: While I was not elected hash trash, nobody else was either,
and therefore there’s nothing any of you can do to stop me, except
remember to write it before I do. So, Ha!! Your still stuck with the
loud-mouthed Mary Fucking Poppins!!!
And what else happened? Um, Toxic Waste drank a whole bottle of Gold
Schlager Peppermint Snapps and once again lived up to his name.
Skidmarks had his underoos ripped to shreds by several hashers, and I
unfortunately got a glimpse of his bare white ass. A couple of other
people got semi naked and re-enacted a gangbang on Pelvis Chestly. All
of this, in Food Bitch’s backyard, and, in plain sight of two ten year
old girls who were playing in a tree house next door. Some of us met up
later at the good Ole’ East End Café, where we partied on some more,
and then from there to Fuk Stik’s hotel room, at the Super 8 Motel
where we partied on some more. What can I say? Some people needed to
take Monday off from work.
All in All it was another shitty, but very memorable, freaking
Stay Tuned for the Next Blue Hen Hash hopefully sometime in the next
month or two.
On ! On!
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